We are told in Genesis that "a deep sleep fell over Adam" - but nowhere does it say in the Bible that he woke up! In essence, all the events that followed Adam's falling asleep are a part of his dream. Metaphysically, Adam represents all of us. We, too, have entered into a deep sleep. As individuals, nations, and a planet, we have forgotten where we have come from, who we are, and where we are going.

An honest look at the troubles we have created for ourselves reveals that we have painfully lost sight of the visions that once painted our future. What began as a happy dream seems to have tail spun into a nightmare. Struggling in the murky shadows spun by the bony fingers of fear, it appears as if there is no escape from the labyrinth of the problems we perceive. The heaviness of our sleep has drawn dark curtains over the memory of our golden origin. But nightmares always end with awakening. While the dream may seem overwhelming when you are in it, it becomes as nothing the moment you open your eyes. Sometimes the awakening is gentle, light, and easy. Often it is startling and feels jarring. But if we are having a painful dream, one in which we see ourselves as powerless, small, or unlovable, is it not worth the shake-up in order to wake up?

The Citadel of Fear Every sojourner of spirit must face the time when the walls that protected his old world begin to crack. Sooner or later the chisels of life's trials pick away at our armor. And this dismantling is wonderful, for there is no greater tragedy than hiding behind something that we are not, living a life that is less than we are.

The universe is continuously working to remind us of our identity and our purpose. If we are living a life that is untrue to our soul's calling, our inner guide will not let us rest until we step back onto our true course. The time comes when we can no longer find refuge in our defenses. We discover, often with awe, that it is precisely our defenses that have kept us in darkness! We tire of straining to protect ourselves, and we feel stifled and restricted by the walls we have built between our hearts and others.

Our defenses are not worth the love we lose in hiding. We cannot afford to maintain a citadel of fear at the cost of peace. In our efforts to keep pain away from our heart, we have also denied entry to joy. The moment arrives when we must break free and make a stand for who we are. That moment is now.

The time has come to cast aside our cloak of smallness and don the robe which honors our true magnitude. We must claim the strength to live in the dignity befitting our identity.

When I first set onto my path of awakening, I felt as if my whole world was falling apart. Many of the things to which I had devoted my time, attention, and energy suddenly became meaningless. It can be very startling and unnerving to discover that the values for which you lived no longer seem real. I did not find the same satisfaction or communication with the friends I was used to spending time with. I wondered why I was doing the kind of work I was in. The social pursuits which had formerly brought me pleasure no longer held gifts for me. I felt that most of the goals that I had strived for were no longer worthy of my continued attention.

My entire sense of purpose had shifted. I had a brief taste of something more and better, but I did not know how to make it a lasting element of my life. I felt lost sometimes even as if I was going crazy. It was a dark night of the soul.

If you are passing through such a night, or have ever done so, take comfort in knowing that such a void is a very important, helpful, and necessary part of the journey.

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